Clouds of my dreams

‘Clouds’…the word brings so many pictures into my mind, there are these snowy white ones streaking the blue sky, then the dark,  gray ones ready to pour down, not to forget the ones which are filled with hues of all kinds as we see the sun rise or sun set… Clouds have always fascinated me. I just love watching these clouds as I sit by the window of the car/bus/train while I’m travelling. They are so beautiful and vivid in shape and form. Sitting by the window of the plane these clouds appear like someone has spread a carpet of cotton before me, and boy! I’m so tempted to walk over it (no, I’m not delusional people ;)). It is just so beautiful to see sun rays play peek-a-boo with you from these clouds.  

And somehow these clouds remind me of dreams. Beautiful, picturesque, light and dark, covering the sun sometimes, or else just blowing with the winds of time. You look at these clouds and they show a different form and picture, that is a reflection of your thoughts. Dreams are like the clouds covering the sky of your heart. Sometimes they stay there for a minute or two, while some other time it looks like they are going to rain on the earth of your life. You stand there looking up at these clouds, anticipating rain, but they are brushed away by the winds of reality. However sometimes these clouds of dreams pour down and infuse “life” into your life.

Like a drought hit region, where the cracks of despair show up on the land, these dreams bring with them the showers of cheer that get soaked in the grounds of psyche so as seeds of hope are irrigated. The cracks are filled and the barren land gives way to green pastures. All this is brought about by the clouds of dreams.

Sometimes it also happens that these showers flood the heart so much that eyes stream out in the form of tears. That’s how dreams are. Like I mentioned they are nomadic and restless. They might reside with you for years, or they might be transitory. Unpredictable, yeah that’s what they are. Sometimes you can pin down a sea of reason for their origin, sometimes not.

We cannot deny that dreams can also fog the reality. At times it is difficult to see the actual path. Obviously when clouds descend too low they block us from seeing our outlook of truth. Then the light of reason has to work hard to find the right way.

But whatever it is, one thing is for sure, they are vibrant and each dream of cloud renders a different beauty to landscape of your heart. I can’t imagine a life without dreams, naah..it would be so lifeless like a sky all painted blue. I would rather have these clouds spread over my sky. So my clouds of dreams whatever you are; you are always welcome to dwell in my heart :) .

Different is not so different

Every day I hear and use management jargons like “competitive advantage”, “differentiating factor”, and “point of difference” etc. today every brand wants to be portrayed as different so as to be recognized, and boy that is a difficult task. I'm sure you must have heard all film stars saying their movie is “hat ke” (different), nothing different about that right?

Why limit this need to be distinguished to products and brands? We humans are just the same. Every other person portrays that he/she is different from the crowd. Well yes, no two people are just the same. The physical, mental and emotional build up of everyone is different. But one thing that is common in most (if not all) is the need to be uncommon.

I have a doubt though, do we really seek to be distinct? Or is it just that we want to be perceived as different? Like the same brand of soap claiming to be different when it is more or less the same as any other brand of soap. While I have seen people claiming to be “no I’m not like the rest”, “I don’t believe in what others say” and blah blah blah, still give them a second look and you will know that they are the same. Leaving me to wonder why?

Hey but I’m not saying that there is anything wrong in being no different. Why should I declare my differences, let others decipher it themselves. Also I believe that there is no use in proclaiming being “hat ke” because the perception they form about you is dependent upon their own understanding and personality.

Also everyone wants to find similar people. Even the ones who are considerably different from the crowd are continuously looking for their types. And trust me it is very satisfying to find someone who works on the same wavelength as you. Humans are social beings, so it is only natural to look for people of your kind. Even the solitude lovers would like to find another solitary reaper.

It is the innate need of humans to be understood and for that they want to express themselves. Sometimes these expressions are more pronounced while in other cases they are subtle. This need to find like minded people is common to all (the distinguished and the common). So what say the different is not so different after all? 

Main.... By Richa Vatsyayan

MAIN

Lad lad kar aage aaun main, phir bhi kyun gir jaun main?

Himmat kar phir uth jaun main, or phir se daud lagaun main,

Phir thokar khakar ladkhadaun main, or phir peeche rah jaun main,

Baar baar himmat jutaaun main, aur apni takdeer se lad jaun main,

Par jab sitaron ka sath na paun main, to kya yunhi bikhar jaun main?

Dil se jise paana chahun main, har baar haath aage badhaun main,

Bas choote choote rah jaun main, to kaise dill ko samjhaun main?

Kya yunhi nirash hokar thak kar vahin tham jaun main?

Jo sapna apni saanson me basaun main, use aise kaise bhool jaun main?

Apne sapne ki khatir is duniya se ladd jaun main,

Jo darker tham gayi main yunhi,

To fir Main kaise kahlaun “Main”…

Happy B'day Sis (choti princess :D) 

Time for disc cleanup: time to forgive and forget

Someone hurts you and your immediate reaction (according to Newton’s 3^rd law of action and reaction) is to get back to that person (slap, kick, punch…etc etc..) Sometimes you are lucky enough to get what you want; else the ideas and words (read profanities) clog your mind. And as fishes rise to the surface crowding water surface as you throw some food, similarly these memories emerge with the mention of a name, an incident, or the person himself/herself. 

But in your intention to hurt the other person you actually end up being miffed yourself. You wanna know the reason? Firstly the “damn it I still can’t beat him/her” feeling, secondly all those unhappy thoughts come back to you. Again you end up feeling more miserable. And in a case where that’s exactly what the other Miss/Mr. intended to do, what are you doing? I’ll tell you, you are actually helping them. So before you get irritated and try and get back to me I’ll tell you what I feel should be done to get even. I think you should try and forgive and if that’s not possible then forget. Now before you say/think “ohho what’s new in that”, I would say there is no other way.

Ok simple reasons to support that. Primarily what do you want to do? Get even, right? Haven’t you heard about the saying, “forgiveness is the best revenge”. Well it is absolutely true. By forgiving you are disappointing (big time) the opponent, coz once he/she has hurt you, they would be expecting some more. You are now spoiling their plans. So you can do Oo..la..la and dance while your rival cribs.

Forgiveness is not just limited to revenge. It makes you realize the other person’s point of view. You spare some time and think from their perspective. How long is it too long to hold on to such memories? C’mon people accept the fact that there are better things to store in your long term memory. Why waste that much memory? I tell you such memories are really bulky. So clean up your disc and get rid of the irrelevant. Obviously you would like to remember the pertinent concepts instead of the unnecessary things.

And the best reason for forgiving and forgetting is coz you yourself would feel great. It is like for quite sometimes you have been straining your nerves, or like you are at a place where you are not getting enough air to breathe, and this hot place is draining out the life out of you. After forgiving and forgetting it’s like you your nerves are relaxed, and the pleasant breeze greets you and you feel revitalized.

So for getting that smile back on your face, forgive and forget not just others, but yourself as well for the times, when you have let yourself down. Forget sad memories, forgive people for disappointing you and you will help yourself.

And if you can’t afford the market leader i.e. forgiveness then try forgetting (the next best thing) and that smile on your face would visit you more often. So don’t wait, get started with the disc clean up.

Happy Birthday Paa.. :)

Parents are known to be the first role models for kids, for a girl her father is the strongest (“My Daddy Strongest”) and her mother is the best looking woman on planet. I would call myself truly blessed coz my parents are the best any kid can ever get. There have been times when I have cursed my luck, because of so many (stupid) reasons, and how does my luck retort? It just reminds me of my parents, and I slap my head and say.. I don’t have a right to complain coz I have already been given the world’s best treasure. So I’m one of the luckiest person on this earth (Richa and Adi are the other two) coz I have you and Maa.

And I’m sure it must not have been the easiest task to be the father of someone like me. My God!! How many questions I ask, and still you patiently answer all of them. I know I can be really cranky at times, and how could you bear all those tantrums of mine? Incredible I would say!! This only makes me feel that I’m born in a family of saints. And if its not tantrums then there are my problems that I keep bugging you with. But i have never seen you complain..forget complain, I have not even seen you give an “uff”. In spite of the demanding nature of your job how do you still manage to take care of our priorities?

Paa…  I do not mention it often but you are a truly amazing person. There is so much that I have learnt from you and still have to learn. I have learnt from you to stand by things I believe in. I have seen that you have stood for things that were right, and didn’t care whether the world was with you or not. You have instilled in me to use my own discretion and understanding to decide what is best for me. If I take pride in being independent then the credit goes to you. I have taken all my decisions coz you encouraged me to do so. I know that you are extremely protective about your family, and so I can guess that it must have been really tough for you to maintain this balance, where you shield us from hardships without hampering our independence. The confidence and trust that I have in me and my capabilities is a reflection of the confidence and trust you have in me. There have been times when I have felt like giving up but you have made me keep my faith in myself.

Paa you are the best father anyone can ever have and a gem of a person. All you kids adore you…and your family is exceptionally blessed to have you. We wish you A very Happy Birthday, and on your B’day all I can do is that pray and wish that you have a long and happy life ahead…Love you Paa….

CAN ETHICS BE TAUGHT IN A CLASSROOM??

I’m sitting in a business ethics class and wondering why am I sitting here? Well I don’t have to bang my head for an answer, it is simple, for attendance and hence eligibility for semester-end exams. This opening remark might suggest that I’m against ethics in business, but it’s not that. I just don’t believe that you can teach a person to be ethical over a period of a two credit course.

I have learnt that personality is built over a period of time and cannot be changed unless something radical happens. I wonder what ‘radical’ change sixteen lectures will bring about in a student’s personality.

With due respect to the college management, I think that this classroom teaching of ethics is… ahem useless. It is baffling that a college can even think about something like classroom teaching of ethics and moral values. Ok so before taking the course you are unethical and after sixteen classes…tadaaa…you are morally right and ethical. So people enter like devils (ok fine the petty humans) and after 16 classes move out with a halo over their head. I wonder where is my halo (probably still in the process). And at the end of the course there will be an exam judging whose halo is better, bigger and brighter.

I’m not sure as to what exactly is the purpose of this course? To make students ethical or just for the heck of it. Well if it is the latter then I’m not complaining, but if it is for the former (which should be in ideal scenario), then I have issues.

I’m surprised that the management of the college is totally oblivious to what students feel about the course. Classroom teaching of ethics! We are no more in primary school so that we could be molded accordingly. If this could work then all the satans would turn out to be saints, or semi-saints/semi-satans (depending upon how you see the glass) by teaching them ethics.

I think there are three things that should be clearly understood, first, as we all know the definition of ethics is not the same for all, so no universal code of ethics is possible. Secondly, it’s not possible to change the moral build-up of any one at this age. The most that can be done is that make a less ethical person relatively more ethical. And thirdly, if this change is to be brought about then it can’t be done via classroom teaching. Instead students should be exposed to some social initiatives. As an alternative to teaching through books and power point, it is better to actually let the students witness the plight of the underprivileged. It might just revolve around the philanthropic aspect of ethics; still it will trigger the latent sensitivities of students. Again it will not bring about any drastic transformation, but I’m hopeful of a temporary alteration in their psyches.

There would be a percentage of people who would not be interested in this, but I have seen that most of the people would appreciate it (yeah contrary to the popular belief, the gen Y is not that insensitive), if not in the first instance, then maybe in the second and the third ones. Moreover it will anyways be much more effective than the present method being followed, so worth taking a chance. Of course all this is under the assumption that the purpose of teaching ethics is to make a person more ethical. Otherwise it’s just a matter of passing 16 x 1.45 hours.

THANK GOD FOR A POOR MEMORY

How many times have you cursed yourself for forgetting things? Many times I must say, ask me I happen to forget a lot of things and then its “oh damn! I forgot this, I forgot that.” And don’t even get me started about forgetting formulae and stuff in exams.  For the guys, ask them what happens after forgetting an important date? Oh they are gone…God save them from the ire of the ladies in their lives! So forgetting is a horrible..terrible thing, right?? I don’t think so…I thank my poor memory instead for its ability to forget.

I believe that forgetfulness is a blessing in disguise. I remember I had read somewhere (I forgot where) about R K Narayan saying the same thing. Forgetting is the very wise mechanism designed by nature to help us maintain our sanity, to recover from setbacks and for our betterment. Believe it people; a bad memory is definitely a good asset. Just because of the reason that a person has a bad memory he/she can let go of things and memories that might harm him/her.

A bad memory makes you resilient, you forget failures and begin afresh. If you are in the habit of remembering each and everything, God knows how many bad memories you will still hold on to. You won’t be able to forgive. Actually forgetting is the next best thing to forgiving.It helps in maintaining relationships bringing people closer.

Your bad memory works hard to distract you from the things that trouble you. Ever thought while you had a fight with one of your friend and had decided that now you won’t talk to him/her again, the next day he/she cracks a joke and you forget the quarrel and laugh, this forgetting habit helps breaking the ice. Consider the time when you are really sad about something, and then your cell beeps, you read it’s a funny message and you get that momentary distraction and smile. There are instances when you tried really hard but could not succeed, and fail, imagine what would have happened had you not forgotten those failures and moved ahead, I’ll tell you, you would have never succeeded. This is the power of forgetting takes you from failures to success and still you crib about bad memory. What else you want from it?

So next time don’t curse your poor memory that much, remember the times it saved your sanity.  Now don’t forget that. But of course there are some things that of course you should not forget, NEVER forget what the lady says is important, now that would be suicidal, nothing can save you from that and don't blame me I had warned you. Just forget the things that are painful and unnecessary. We must remember to forget. I really thank God for a bad memory, it has helped me so much thorough out my life.:)